We often picture love as romantic dinners, tender encounters, surprises, thoughtful gestures, helpfulness, and support. Admittedly these are the best parts. And yet, for me, loving is much, much more. It is also a radical commitment to take on all the obstacles—the fights, the anger, and the hurt; the stress, life’s uncertainties, and even our own insecurities in order to know something so sweet, so healing, so life-giving that our own lives would be incomplete without it.

Being fiercely in love isn’t about staying together when it would be unhealthy to do so. It is about finding the courage to say what is in your heart in the midst of a bad moment and it's a willingness to listen deeply to what is in your partner's heart. It’s about both of you telling your truth because that’s what it means to love yourself and to love another.

I believe a commitment to love is nothing less than a commitment to take on life itself—to not hide from the difficult feelings and situations but to companion them—herd them if you will—toward your own deepest understanding of kindness and compassion for yourself and your beloved.

~ Denise